Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Reasons why alcohol is "good" for the human species

Get this joke from Dr Palani regarding alcohol :)

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
Jack Handy
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
Henny Youngman
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
Stephen Wright
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
Brian O'Rourke
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm.

Here's how it went:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest & weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed & health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain
cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."


Darren said...


doc notti said...

dr evil no post? nor john guiness?? i personally think alcohol in moderation does us good

hornbill said...

does alcohol gud for health?

Chen said...

D notti,
might be John G "epent" liao.. no longer drinking beer already :P

alcohol intake in small or moderate amount is alright, but if excessive intake, will leads to lotsa undesirable adverse effects :) And basically it can cause damage to most of the organs in the body.. not only the liver, but the brain, heart, gut, nervous system, blood etc.. I don't use medical terms here to describe the conditions else u will feel pening reading all those medical terminology :)

Homer Simpson said...

beer is good... as Homer always says... "mmmmmm... beer..." :P